Maybe this wasn’t my best idea…
If you’ve taken my Going Gray Gracefully class, or I’ve done your colors, you know that I’m a huge fan of shoe paint. This acrylic miracle worker comes in 100 colors (which you can further blend yourself) from Angelus Direct. A little 1 oz bottle costs only $2.95 and can completely transform a pair of shoes or belt. (See examples here and here.)
Well, the other day I had a brilliant idea. If I could paint shoes, what about glasses frames—they’re acrylic, right? I had a neglected pair of glasses that would look much better on me if they were silver. If the paint job was a disaster, my only real loss would be some fussing time. Anyway, what could go wrong?
First, a confession. I should never have chosen these frames in the first place. I was at Costco with a new prescription but couldn’t decide what frame to pick. Finally the impatient clerk said, “The black ones look best; get those.” Somehow I then convinced myself that the inner layer of aqua teal would mitigate the outer layer of black, which is too stark on me. (The only person who could see the teal was me, the wearer, looking cross-eyed towards my nose.)
I googled “painting eyeglass frames” and sure enough I had all the ingredients—acrylic plastic primer, Frog masking tape, a fine watercolor brush and my silver paint. I unscrewed the teeny tiny screws that held on the side pieces, carefully covered the glass with tape (trimmed precisely with a mat knife), then sprayed a thin layer of primer. After maybe an hour I applied the silver paint.
Oh my, did I feel smug as I removed the tape a few hours later, because the frames looked very cool. That’s when I realized there was no way one person with only two hands could get the teeny tiny screws back in. Worse, I discovered the hinges are spring-loaded so the screw holes retract back into the side piece, meaning I needed a lot more than additional hands. I would have to crawl into an optician’s office, whimpering pathetically, ask for forgiveness for my tampering sins, and hope they’d be willing to help.
I remembered a pleasant shop, Hendrix & McGuire Optical, across the street from Portland’s Central Library, which turns out to be a women-owned business specializing in vintage style frames and resurrecting old ones. Two of the gals were behind the counter when I came hang-dogging in. They laughed heartily at my sorry tale. “The only other time we’ve seen someone try this was a gal who neglected to cover the glass part.” Rhonda said. “That pair was toast.” She spent a good fifteen minutes with mine, but got eventually them back together. They’re a bit brighter than I expected, but still, an improvement.
Meanwhile, I roamed the shop, and you guessed it. I ordered a new pair of silver-framed glasses because even though I like my painted glasses, I doubt they’ll hold up to daily wear. They new ones are relatively conservative, which is good if you want people to focus on YOU instead of your glasses, and mostly that’s what I want. Nevertheless, I still regret lacking the nerve to buy my all-time favorite frames in France several years ago.
Getting the right shape, size and color glasses is a challenge for everyone. It’s important, because you wear them every day and they need to make you look better, not worse. Evidently I’m better at helping my clients with this task than helping myself…
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